It is not always easy to remain heart centred when we are not taught how to be emotional and in fact often we are taught not to be emotional, In the west we are constantly receiving accolades for being logical and rational and keeping our emotions in check.
Heart centred living is a concept that is at odds with the concepts we have learnt . What does it mean to attain heart centred living?
Over our lifetime the majority of us have been programmed to live through logic and rational thought and many have been discouraged from showing or expressing emotions.
How many of us just allow our life to run on automatic as we cope with daily pressures. Often the best we can do at the end of a work day is to feed ourselves and fall in to bed. And while we stumble through our lives doing what we have come to believe will bring us success, how often does this way of existing feel fulfilling or joyful?
Many of us would consider we are just going through the motions and have no energy to question the current status quo despite being less than satisfied with what we are doing or where we are heading.
To add to this general dissatisfaction, if we were to explore our direction we can feel unable to muster up the energy or insight to regroup and look at what we could do. After all we have probably been following advice and guidance installed over many years and it is not easy to think outside of the box when we have no idea there is an alternative or fear moving away from the 'norm'.
The programming we are still under is very effective and has been a constant drip feed from well intentioned parents to curriculum limited schools, colleges and universities. We have to question how much of what we have learnt has proven to be useful. Were we taught to be heart centred free thinkers or taught skills and knowledge that keeps us within a universal 'norm' that is not conducive with spotlighting our natural talents and supporting our creative developing mindset.
How are we supposed to live heart centred lives when the framework of society is only working towards conformity. For those of us who are not destined to be made to fit in a square hole it can undermine our quest for living in alignment with our heart.
We can be forgiven for thinking what is it all about? Perhaps that is why we put our heads down and distract ourselves from too much analysis and questioning. Follow in our parents footsteps rather than shake the cage.
It is hardly surprising that the status of our mental health as a species has continued to suffer and the need for mental health support has risen exponentially. But we seem to be looking at mental health challenges from the perspective of fixing superficially rather than changing the current state of society that is the very thing that undermines and does not support our wellbeing.
We were never suited for long hours of mental pressure and stress to follow a career and/or lifestyle. Stress is a short term strategy to move us from life threatening situations to safety. But the 21st century human being has been taught to push and shove and wrestle with ourselves to constantly achieve. There is no sitting back and enjoying the fruits or our labour, just hard slog and consistent tension to do more! Be more productive!
This style of living has reaped havoc on our immune systems and adrenals as we are never very far away from adrenal overload flooding our system with adrenaline and cortisol. We are tempted with promises of what might be but never quite get there and have to just continue to push on further.
How often are we taught to engage with our dreams and passions to know what is right for us as individuals. We are encouraged to believe in magic and make believe pre-school and to express ourselves only to be told to sit down, shut up and listen at school. We are taught to follow our dreams within the confines of what is considered acceptable and not to connect to our heart when making decisions..
We have been mislead to believe that the answers were external to us and to chase happiness by committing to frequently mindless and purposeless hard work. A life of chasing the carrot in a fruitless effort for enlightenment and the promise of a charmed life we see play out on screen. This message of lacking propels us to seek abundance in a desperate and joyless fashion that can only end in frustration.
To find true contentment requires a complete mind shift and spiritual awakening. There is much debate what it means to follow a spiritual path and the easiest explanation is living in a heightened awareness. Personal awareness is a gradual journey that strips away beliefs that do not fit with our contentment. Often these past beliefs were unwittingly passed on by our care givers. Awareness brings us new opportunity to discover our own purpose and unique offering to the world.
We are all born with the capacity to live in a heart centred way and young children fully harness contentment and do what brings their heart joy.. The simplest of things can bring wonder and fascination. Learning about the world around them is fun.
Bringing back the heart centred joy in every day life is the secret. Love and joy is not something we aim towards it is a way of being now that carries us through life and supports and shapes our decisions.
5 Steps to Heart Centred Living
How can you take steps towards heart centred living?
- Ask yourself what you would get out of bed and do without being asked just out of joy? What in life are you so passionate about that you get excited when thinking about it? Maybe it is painting, dancing or animals.
Whatever it is how could you incorporate more of it into your life? Could you develop a career around it?
2. What energy disrupting and frequency lowering beliefs have you held? It is easiest to notice these when you are working towards something you really want. These limiting beliefs talk you down and stop you making progress.
When you identify these beliefs ask yourself two very important questions.
1, Is this true?
2. Can I do anything about it?
When asking the first question it can be easier to get a friend to say out loud the belief statement and notice your reaction to it. In most cases the truth of the belief has not been challenged before it has just run over a long period and been taken as truth. It may feel outdated and sometimes even ridiculous that you remained living with this belief as if it were true. When you have identified the level of truth in this statement it is easier to let it go as it loosens in your unconscious.
For the second question as the belief in question is held by you, the answer will always be yes and this allows you to decide what changes you want to make. Please do take a look at my
EFT Tap to help to create movement and diminish the affect of this old belief that is likely to be infantile and outmoded. If it is a core belief it can be beneficial to seek an energy practitioners' help as a core belief is easier seen and dissipated with professional help.
3, To embody being love centred forgiveness of yourself is crucial. We may say that we forgive ourselves, but in reality if we are still harbouring unhelpful emotion around ourselves and how we behave in the world it is likely the forgiveness has not been fully processed and the critical words have resonated internally and live in your energy field.
Becoming aware of the words and thoughts you have allowed to vibrate gives you a way of making change. Notice the words you use and what emotion they resonate with. Critical words and thoughts vibrate at the same rate as fear - low and dense.
When you recognise these limiting words and thoughts it is much easier to remove them by learning to move from fear to love. To start to create movement bring to your conscious awareness that which you love unconditionally. Maybe a child, a pet or nature. Allow that love to expand your heart with pure light and notice how it seeps into every cell of your being and with each breath expand that love out to the edge of your aura. Notice the expansive nature of this energy that is far bigger and beyond you. Become aware of its infinite nature as it just keeps growing. Enjoy the feeling as you vibrate on the frequency and power of love.
Now that you know how you feel heart centred love you can recall this anytime you choose. Heart centred love is your creation and you choose when and how you feel it. Like any other practice the more you do it the easier and more powerful it becomes.
4. Heart centred living relies on being present in the now and accepting of what is. This is not to say that you may like the current situation, but that you accept the current position rather than fight it. If as in step 2 you cannot make any change to the current situation you will be able to discern whether your attention and focus are best redirected. Life does not always go to plan and acceptance is key to making the best of what is and the now moment. It is important to identify if you are present and this can be confirmed easily by becoming more aware of your body..
Notice if you can feel sensations in your body? When you are purely functioning within your head there is no sense of being in your body in the now. Just by breathing more consciously and filling your lung capacity you will return to your body.
To further this sense of being present cross your arms and place your hands just above your opposite elbow. Gently tap each hand bilaterally on each arm. Continue to do this for a minute or two. Not only will you feel more in your body and grounded it will encourage a sense of calm and love.
Being in the now gives you power to make positive change as you let go of the pressure of time. Imagine suspending time and as you do slowing down your breathing, slowing down your heart rate.
Become more aware of the space you have as you slow everything down. Space has no limit and you can begin to notice the space within your mind. Space to think or not, space to enjoy this moment right now where you are right now. There are no issues in the now. Enjoy the space you have to be in the now.
In the wholeness of this present state notice how much more open you feel. Open to ideas, open to new thoughts and open to opportunities.
Open your heart to this now moment as you become aware of the rhythm of your life as it slowly beats and allows you to be more fluid and easy following the flow of your body. Your heart is your life force and vibrating at the frequency of love is the fuel of your life force in every moment.
5. Learning to thrive with your emotions is crucial to how you respond to life. Allow each emotion to be fully acknowledged. Honour the emotion, allow yourself to just be with the emotion. Allow the natural movement of the emotion through you.
There are no bad emotions. You have been blessed with emotions to learn to work with them and alongside them. You are not your emotions, your emotions are a gauge of how you are. Welcome the feedback system as information on your current wellbeing and allow yourself time to process and decide on whether you are required to respond or not?
If you suppress emotions that do not feel comfortable the emotion is prolonged and can become stuck. Emotions were meant to be felt and released. When you resist they persist. Remind yourself everything passes. In this moment with this emotion I am still safe. In this moment with this emotion I can still choose how to respond.
Heart centred living is the opportunity to be free to connect to all of your emotions and know you are developing your resilience.
When you have mastered this step you have managed fear. This does not mean you will not feel fear but it does mean you will no longer fear feeling fear or any other uncomfortable feeling and know emotions for what they really are - a messaging system of your wellbeing. Remain true to you and your purpose and work with your emotions as an advantage to knowing and being.
Heart centred living is the ability to connect, express, accept, make mistakes and grow in love.
Life's lessons are an opportunity to elevate you as you touch the world with your emotional honesty.
Karen Oliver
www.e-motionalsolutions.co.uk
karen4@e-motionalsolutions.co.uk
07782 381855/01932 403780
